Metta matters

I often ask myself if I am contributing to better the humanity in the best way possible, the way I can and am supposed to. Am I putting my best effort and my talent/ability to do what I can do? And what exactly is it that I should be doing? Is what I am doing what I should be doing?

Often I am confused. A lot of the times I am not sure. 

Maybe there is no one answer or one truth. Maybe there are more than one path that leads to the answer. Maybe there is no answer at all. Or maybe, when I feel I am doing something right I would know that’s the answer.

I hope to contribute to restore humanity. One thing I do is to be kind to everyone I encounter, stranger or friend or student or parent. Another is to stay positive and spread positive messages across to uplift people’s souls, I think it’s important and particularly useful for those who just have a bad day/time – who doesn’t once in a while? They just need to be reminded that there is hope at the end of that tunnel, however dark or long it seems at times. We need to give each other compassion and hope. And above all, love. Metta – loving kindness. 

Namaste. 

80/20 Principle

“There is no value in doing things you don’t enjoy.

Do the things that you like doing. Make them your job. Make your job them. Nearly everyone who has become rich has had the added bonus of becoming rich doing things they enjoy.”

Isn’t this a simple and almost common sense kind of concept?

Yes, do things we love. But somehow we just don’t do them enough.

Why? Because we have to make a living.

Why can’t we do things we love as a living?

We can! We just have to choose what we really want to do in our lives and make it happen.

Think for a moment what you truly love spending time in. What makes you smile when you think about this? Take a minute or two to really dig deep and think about it, nothing too small or strange or meaningless or useless here. Just something close to your heart and soul, to your core, to your belief, to your hopes and dreams, to your faith, to your life purpose.

Take a deep breathe in. Pause. Wait. It shall come to you.

That one thought would be your true calling.

If it hasn’t come to you yet, it’s ok. Do this exercise often, until you find it. It is important. You know it is, because you have been feeling so lost all these years haven’t you? Going in to the office day by day, month by month, year by year, and you feel, nothing, but exhaustion and frustration.

Some of you might be better, not exactly feeling so bad, but not exactly feeling so great either, no? Don’t you want to feel hopeful going to bed at night so that you wake up fully rested in the next morning feeling excited about going to work? Have you ever felt that way about your work? Or simply, your life?

If you have never felt this way, my friend, this is wrong way of living. I am not saying wrong to criticize how you do this, but you have not been treating yourself kindly. You deserve better treatment, and you are responsible for taking care of yourself to live the way you want to live, to have a life you want to have, to have a job you want to go work at.

It is your life in the making, every second, every minute, every hour, every day, every month, every year. It’s slipping away through your fingers, are you still waiting for some magic or miracle, a lottery, to help you get out of this situation you so not want to be in?

Let me remind you, my friend, you chose to stay. In fact, you are still choosing it.

Not changing the situation you are in is a choice. You have chosen to stay in the rut.

Maybe you think I am being harsh. In fact, I am being compassionate and concerned about your well being.

I don’t want you to feel like this anymore. I don’t.

Let’s start a revolution here. Let’s start a new chapter in our lives together. Together we can. Shall we?

I am going to share more with you my readings and thoughts to empower you so you too can find your purpose and happiness in life, because, as I mentioned earlier, and I would like to stress again,

YOU DESERVE IT.

Namaste,

Self Wonder.

Love is love is love

Love is love is love

Love is inexplicable. 

You love a song, a book, a hobby, a place, a person. 

Yes you can explain in great details why you love them, the most technical analytical way.

But at the end of the day, it all comes down to the feeling, the sensation inside your body they have given you. the chill and the joy you feel when you think about them or best,  experience them. 

There is this exhilarating joy you don’t even know where it comes from. But you feel it and it is real to you. You don’t even know how to describe it exactly to anyone else, but certainly those who have experienced that feeling would understand it in their own way.

There is also this true sense of pure contentment about life. You feel complete and whole. You feel life is so great, and you are invincible. You never feel so alive before. Now you know how to live for the first time.

You find love is real, even the finding seems unreal to you. You live in a paradise right now you never knew it existed.

Suddenly everything is perfect and nothing can get to you. You are just so happy and content you don’t even bother to have a small cringe on your face. You just can’t.

Your mouth is in the constant state of curling up. Somehow it doesn’t know how to curl down at its two corners anymore. You are simply too happy to do so.

Your heart is pure and its in its right place. It’s calm and it’s passionate and its full and its clear. Mostly it’s beating as hard as it has ever been. It’s alive!

Love is love is love is love is love.  It is explicable and it is inexplicable.

Namaste.

SelfWonder

“Where do you want to be in five years?”

“Where do you want to be in five years?”

It is a decent legitimate question, and a question that I ask myself from time to time, often replacing the number “five” with “three” or “ten”.

Suddenly, it dawns on me that, the question I should ask myself is, 

“Where do I want to be in my life years?”

The question is not about three or five or ten years anymore. It is about the lifetime, the lifetime ahead that is left for me. 

The direction for that answer becomes completely different. 

It is not with whom I want to be right now. It is with whom I want to be for my life, the person who would add value and color to my life, which would become bigger, brighter and with more substance. 

It is not with whom I can have fun right now, rather it is the person with whom I can have long term fun and adventure with. 

It is not what I can do to make a living right now, but, the kind of work I can make good living and at the same time spend my life adding value to and feeling joy with myself and others.

It is not where I want to be for five years anymore, rather, it is a space and a community in which I can be the person I want to be, with that person I can be with, and that work I can do in the long run. 

It is not the life I want to be in for now, but the lifestyle I can live with freely, joyfully, positively and with the least restraint and constraint I can have. 

I appreciate your thoughts on this if any.

With gratitude,

Self Wonder

Hello! Grandma and Bear :)

Today I went out to meet a friend for lunch (it rarely happened to me because I was always busy at lunch hour).

On my way to meet my friend I passed by a shop. And you know what I found! This!

I could not believe my eyes. There is actually an other strangely color-coded bear, this one being designed by a famous fashion brand, as compared to the one I had, a stuff fluffy one and much bigger one instead, probably made by an unknown local brand. How old they both had this weird color combination. And mine had even three green buttons over its belly, which was most likely white but I could not remember for sure.

I was amazed. Finally I found it by accident, and in a highly unlikely place and situation. But this one was very plasticky and tiny. It was a USB. You could pull it out from the bear’s head. And you could also wear it as a necklace (a golden chain was attached to the top of the bear obviously).

But hey. My bear had been reincarnated so to speak. And it reminded of my Grandma obviously, who bought me the odd-color-combo stuffed animal bear one night when we were out for dinner. I was probably 7 or 8, or even younger. It was the last thing she had ever left me. And one day my Dad just threw it away for his own righteous reason.

Tonight as I was meditating, I saw my Grandma holding the Pink Bear. She and Bear were standing on top of this white marble staircase, looking down smiling at me. She said, “we are alright here. Your bear is safe with me. You can come here anytime and talk with us.”

I was so happy. Now I knew where to find my wonderful Grandma. And my Bear.

An Imaginary Ad for What I want

When I think about people/relationship/attitude/situation, I always start with what I don’t want, and most likely just stop there.

Today I want to try writing down things that I want.

So here you go.

I want:

1. A Life with Purpose

Yes I would like to think it does matter. Certainly one can live just to pass the days, but for me it just seems to be boring and meaningless. And by having a purpose I don’t mean you have to have a crazy ambitious goal like becoming the new CEO of Google (btw the new one seems pretty awesome), but if you want to that’s also great! You might want to be a loving partner /friend /parent, be responsible for your work, have a cause to protect the environment/animals, advocate gay rights/women rights, become a great writer/spiritual leader/Hollywood star… I mean the choices there are endless! You just have to pick a cause and try hard at it. Give it a go. Give yourself a chance.

So I guess the next is –

2. A Life with Courage

I don’t want to live in fear -whether it be fear of failure /embarrassment /getting hurt physically or emotionally /losing something or someone – anymore. Life is worth taking a risk. In fact, a life well lived depends on it. Your life is worth that risk you are dying to take. Try it. Maybe it’s something for fun, some project at work, someone you fancy, someone you miss/want to make up with. Just go for it/him/her already! Nothing to lose really. But if you miss that chance you have right now, you really might not get it back (trust me on this one, you most likely don’t, ever, again, scary isn’t it). Try it and you can leave it all behind if it didn’t work out at the end, knowing that you have tried it would certainly make you feel good with a smile on your face when you think about it 🙂

3. A Life with Adventure

I want to take more risk. Have more fun. Meet new friends. Travel new places. Try new cuisines. Listen to new music. Have new experience, big or small. I just want my life to be awesome and full of interesting experiences and stories to tell later on, to my readers at least! And have something of reminiscent quality for my older self when I am in my 70s hahaha.

4. A Life with Love
Ok, I am guilty at fault about such topic in the department of romantic love. But hey, I am also talking about self-love which is of the utmost importance! Then it’s family love, friends’ love, and for me, I don’t know how to put it, but let’s just say community love- a love that is connected through a cause, a belief in something, a love in something that is of tremendous importance to me and the people concerned, and with that we create love among us.

And of course, love for music and arts. Love for freedom and creativity. Love for free thinking and writing. Love for the nature, the sky, ocean, trees, butterflies and cats haha. They are all so beautiful.

Now suddenly I can see and feel, I have a wonderful life living already and ahead. You see, it’s always good to write it all out and share with others. Because when you are generous with beautiful,
positive and encouraging thoughts to others in words (written or spoken), you always, and I say always, receive something back, maybe even more you can imagine.

Peace. Namaste.
Self Wonder x

The No! and YES! to the new quarter of 2015

The No! first (say BYE to the last quarter and all the wrongs behind)- ended as of March 31, 2015 :

1. Fuck love. (the fake ones anyway)

2. Fuck men. (or more appropriately, they can go fuck themselves, those ungrateful bastards)

3. Fuck those selfish, life sucking, grumpy, non-supportive, take-you-for-granted people. (and that can include family)

4. Fuck men you fucked before who were too stupid and egoistic enough to see that you were the best thing ever happened to them. They can now really go fuck themselves (coz you are not there anymore, and yes, it seems redundant as no.2, but I am still going to repeat this).

5. Fuck stress and anger.

6. Fuck boredom and emotion.

7. Fuck being poor and worried about $$$.

8. Fuck being disorganized and lost in life (all aspects: personal, work, financial, diet etc).

9. Fuck not supporting yourself and love yourself (coz you totally deserve to be supported and loved).

10. Fuck being a chick shit and fear of taking risk.

THE MOST INTERESTING WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE… :

And now to the YES!!! to a new beautiful positive fun awesome life – starting as of April 1 2015 which is TODAY! :

1. ME: Love Me. Me. Me.

2. Business. $$$.

3. Adventure. Wherever life takes me.

4. Health (all aspects). FUN.

5. Live my life, like I have never lived before.

6. Love. (if I ever find it, I know contradictory to the top 1, so I have reservations on this point).

7. True friends. Form a trust circle with them.

8. Create something that is larger than life: Art.

9. Create something that is larger than my life: Helping people and change the world for the better. Create jobs for others. bring them education. Bring them freedom.

10. Always. Always. Be True to myself.

“I am Proud of You.”

I’ve been waiting for my whole life. To hear that line.

To feel, to understand, to be appreciated.

Sometimes I feel, I don’t need it. I don’t need anyone’s approval.

What am I, a four-year-old child? A pet?

At times I feel, I don’t need anyone anymore. I can live off on a remote island, in the countryside alone, or some monastery, being religious, devoted fully to God and all.

But I also understand, I need connection.

I, however tough that I am, however independent that I am, I, do need people.

People to love, people to be in love with, people to love one another.

That is what life is worth living for.

We all, need that connection in life.

No one is an island.

So, no matter where you are, how you are doing, what situation you are in, how you are feeling.

I want you to know, that I, am absolutely proud of you.

I am proud of who you are, what you have gone through and still are staying strong.

I am proud of you, even at times you feel you cannot keep going on, you still try to hang in there, that even you might numb yourself at night with whatever means you get to and are comfortable with, you still wake up in the next morning/day, try to be someone, try to make something of yourself. You still try to work hard and be the best for those around you, especially for those you are close to. Because you know, deep inside, you want to show them that you care about them, that they would still stand up every day and try to make the best out of themselves no matter how tough the situation they are in.

It’s called “pay it forward.”

Because, when you try to be tough and caring for someone else, you also gain another day to live.

Helping others helps yourself. It’s that simple.

So today, get out there, and help others. Focus on other people, especially when you feel like you can’t keep going on.

When you focus on helping others, you feel good. And then you understand, even when you feel you are absolutely helpless/worthless, you, are enough. You are important to others. And you know that deep inside you. You only need to be reminded. By focusing on others.

So today, no matter how terrible you got knocked down yesterday. You get back up. And you go out there, and be who you want to be.

Because you my Friend, are worth it.

And I your Friend, am proud of you. Absolutely, 100% proud of you.

Peace out. Namaste.

Be good to yourself. Be proud. And be strong.

What matters most…

Everyday is the day to make that change, to become the person you always want to be.

The day is today.

Seize every chance you get. Take it. And do it.

Make every minute count. Live every day as if it’s the last day of your life. You don’t know how long your life would last. Don’t leave anything undone and any words unsaid.

The moment is now.

Make it happen.

Do it now. Say it now.

Make it NOW.

I look forward to a beautiful tomorrow.

Yummy breakfast to look forward to!!




Night falls. It’s time for bed.
A full day of hard work is completed. Still feeling energetic, I know it’s time to go get rest and be ready for tomorrow.

Indeed, recently in the last few days, I’ve been looking forward to go to bed early so that I can wake up the next day feeling energized and refreshed. And for some reason, perhaps healthier/cleaner diet and even more exercises, I feel so much more alive mentally and alert physically throughout the day and do not get tired as easily like I did before.

But I think there is some other reason, and that is I’m starting to have clearer idea of what I want in my life.

For the past year or two, I was merely going through the days instead of living them. Gradually, I was learning to understand what I did not want in life. Now, I am getting to know what I really want for myself in the future, and I am getting totally excited about making it happen, by trying new things and experiences. Of course, I still have my doubts and fear, that at times I just want to stop and quit trying. I have to admit that although I consider myself to be quite a brave person, sometimes I am still a bit scared. I worry about failing. What if it doesn’t work? Won’t I be wasting my time and effort into it? But deep inside I know, I want to keep trying and make it happen, no matter how hard it would be and how much time it might require to get there, I am still willing to see to it.

You know why? Because I only have one life to live. Life is wasted when I spend too much time and effort on how I can do wrong instead of how I can make right, or at least make happen.

So tonight I am grateful for what I’ve done today, that I’ve tried something new and made the most out of the day. Now I shall get rest and look forward to wake up to another beautiful tomorrow.

Have a wonderful day you all! X