Yes, I want to write about sex.
Why are people so afraid of bringing the topic up? Can they actually discussing it like some freaking sensible adults?
Instead they sneak behind one another’s back and do it “in secret”.
What is wrong with people? Can they grow up and talk about it like it is stock market or diet? Maybe they would do it better and get it done more if so.
Anyhow, I start to feel like I am going to hate sex, even I love(d) it.
I hate it for how people treat it.
I hate how people manipulate each other for the wrong reason to get it done,
Like the man pretends to loves her so that she would have sex with him,
Like the woman does it to please the man even she doesn’t want to do it that time,
Like people stay in a relationship just to have sex regularly, even the sex is not good,
Like people just do it without even knowing how to do it well and enjoy it.
It is the same way people treat relationship and marriage,
Or friendship and family,
Or work,
Or themselves.
They never take it seriously.
They never take themselves seriously enough to know who they are and what they really wants. I mean, what they really wants.
“What do you want me to do to you?” “What do you want in this relationship?” “What do you want out of this experience/connection/work?”
Most do not know what they want, and they never ask for exactly the way they want it.
They do it ok, and they go for ok.
I just can’t do it. I just can’t take it. What the hell is “ok”??
And do I have to be positive and energetic smily all the time? I don’t want and like to be negative, but sometimes I just am not in the mood to be all smily and cheerful, I just want to be neutral and stay inert. I don’t want to have to take care of others’ feelings and entertain people all the time. I don’t want to be rude, but maybe, when I say I am sick and I need rest, you can just bugger off somewhere else automatically and swiftly without me telling you to?
Time to retrieve. “Sign out”.
Totally neutral and inert,
SelfWonder x
Self Wonder 